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Do you have a messed up ex, who is negatively effecting the kids? Have you ever wondered what Dr Leman thought about parenting philosophies? He answers those questions in this episode.

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Items from the podcast

Question #1
Subject: dad under the influence

My 2 children are required by the courts to visit Dad every other weekend.He is court ordered to be driven to pick up kids.Last weekend at drop off I approached the car to ask him to buy shoes for kids for when they visit (he is an attorney w/ no license and has not paid a penny of child support). He could hardly form a sentence- he was so messed up. His Mom ,the driver spoke for him.I e mailed him about the inappropriateness of his behavior on many different levels. I have a breathalyzer and am tempted  make him use it next time. Should I keep  children from him ? I have no proof and his mom has lied for him in court so no help there.I am very fearful of his behaviors.I also told him no more visitation unless I see sneakers in his hand when picks up kids.The kids love him but recognize things aren’t “right” at Dads house.

Answer:
1. When you involve the courts, they generally cut the kids in two. The kids have to shuttle between two homes. This is not good for the kids. The courts are simply doing their job.
2. I would withhold the kids from him. I suggest that you video his actions and words. While videoing say, “You look high. You looked messed up.” Get as much audio and video proof on his behavior to use in the courts.
3. Go back to the courts with evidence to help keep your kids safe.

Question #2
Subject: Parenting Methods

In this age where there is such a variety of parenting philosophies, people get so possessive of the philosophy they follow and very judgmental of people who don’t share their philosophy. I was recently part of a discussion regarding attachment parenting compared to other philosophies. I’m wondering what your views are on Attachment Parenting.  Thanks!

Answer:
1. Some groups believe that kids should be next to you at all times. These may not be the best method.
2. Your kids will want to pull away at age 10, 11, 12 or later till they find independence.
3. Independence is the goal and is the ultimate reality.
4. The goal is to launch your kids into life by training them up. You want your kids to be able to think critically in their life.

Announcement

The next session is on Keep the Tennis Ball of Life in their Court. If you have a question or thought regarding this topic, please leave us a voicemail for the next session. It must be under 30 seconds for the podcast. We reserve the right to use your question on the podcast. (This is NOT a private voicemail for personal counseling.)

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